Monday, December 15, 2008

Removal of Cast May Have Unintended Side Effects

At first when the cast came off, I had crashing disappointment that I wasn't miraculously cured of broken leg. Today, I experienced the other side. As I sat in the back of the taxi, I watched the blue sign with the octopus come into focus, and get brighter and clearer as we got closer, and my heart began to beat a little faster. It wasn't another panic attack, I wasn't light-headed from not having eaten, and praise God I wasn't sick again.

I was going home.

"Yeogiyo," I said as the corner came up. I paid my fare and hurried out of the next passenger's way, hobbling into my building's entryway. Checking for mail (read: bills) incredibly briefly (there might actually be something in my box), my feet continued up the stairs. It wasn't until I was halfway up that I realized I was using the stairs like a normal person, alternating feet instead of putting both feet on one stair before taking the next. With a genuine smile, I stood in front of my door, keys jingling as my hand shook with anticipation, sliding the oddly-shaped piece of metal into the lock, twisting it one way before remembering it's supposed to go the other.

As I swung the door open and saw all of my possessions in my small apartment, the relief washed over me, and yes, for the 47th consecutive day my eyes welled up. It wasn't out of pain, or an intense desire that my mom was with me, or an intense desire to flee Korea altogether, or out of heartache to leave my house... It was the knowledge that I was out of the woods that streamed down my cheeks. We made it, dear reader! We made it!

2 comments:

Tracy Paige said...

Yay for being home. I do understand how good it is to be in your own place after you've been away from it for so long. I am happy for you K-bug.

Miss Chris said...

There's no place like home! Glad you are settling back into normal!